When I lost you I thought my body would bury me alive.
I thought the scars would disfigure even my very soul.
I realised that my life had never been my own and that
Symbiotically I lived through loving you more.
Our paths intertwined for a season and then forked away.
The bandage of your presence in my soul was ripped away
And my wounded being was dragged through a salt desert
In scorching heat.
I screamed for you.
Your face appeared in the blue of the sky and stared coldly
At my naked, wounded, exposed body and then
Turned away with unfamiliar ease.
There was no oasis in sight.
By night, the stars stung my skin like luminous nettles.
I crawled on my belly like a serpent wounded under the heel of
A mercenary that sought absolution from matters of the heart.
I fed on the salty dust and drank the sweat from my burning brow.
And then I saw it…
The silver dune that flowed through the desert.
It was silent, gentle and soft.
It enveloped me, swallowed me whole and whispered
Healing into my bones.
I cried from deep within my hollow soul.
I cried from my grief of losing your spirit connection.
I cried from the memory of your warm skin in my cold sheets.
And then I fell asleep in the arms of the dune.
I am awake now…
Alive with fresh blood in my veins.
I see you now and then like a silhouette of days once blissful but
Now painful to think of.
We started dancing…
The music stopped.
I tried to sing.
You hated my singing.
Now I sing myself to sleep.
I still hear our music in my head and I sing a new ballad over it.
And that ballad is overflowing with infinite purpose.
Frank Malaba ©2012